“I meet people everywhere I go and expand my community powerfully. It takes a village, and I have one”— My Love Manifesto
“Ten thousand hours felt like ten thousand hands
Ten thousands hands, they carry me”—Mackelmore
If there is ONE single thing I wish I could scream at people it’s this…………………………………….. YOU CANNOT LIVE A FULFILLED LIFE AND DO IT ALL ALONE…
For a long time, I thought there was pride in being the self sufficient, independent one. I needed no one.
I was raised with the story that women were to be all encompassing, be able to do it all and BE it all, look great and to “be sure to make enough money to be a single mom”, that’s, if I chose to have kids.
I was taught that it was celebrated if I could be strong, in the face of anything, without breaking down, in public at least. It paid off when I put others before me, they were happier. It kept my household “together”. I began to believe that my inner world should be hidden from others and that we were to appear to be able to do it “all by ourselves”. This, of course, is a small summary of the larger picture, but, you get it.
In my late 20s, when I had Ayden and was losing my Ma, I was beginning to see that this sham was not going to get me far. Trust me, I had attempted to be the Perfect, do it all and handle it all, with a smile and I was about to go down in flames, or anti-depressants. I needed Community more than ever.
I had very few people in my life then, and they all rallied. My friend Steph looked after Ayden daily. She made sure I slept some, cried and knew I was going to be ok. When Ma died, she flew in from Calgary to look after Ayden, probably more, Me. Melanie drove from Nanaimo to take Ayden, 6 months old, for 5 days while I grieved. My moms friends, Melanie and Lorraine banded together with me. This was my first glimpse of Community. It was bittersweet for me. Part of me felt like I was failing by taking all of this help. Part of me felt like I could finally manage life, and whatever that took, I was in.
For the last four years, I have been in. I have been meeting people and connecting with them. It’s been a magical ride. I never knew that most people are so incredible, willing to contribute and actually fulfilled themSelves by contributing.
As I built Community more and more I realized the opportunity it truly is, really, beyond your wildest dreams. It’s scary too. Since, when you are dealing with humans, people come and go, and in a large community that’s part of the ebb and flow. It’s painful sometimes, and so rewarding.
Come-unity has taught me everything. Here are a few snipits for you!
-Many hands make for light work
-When people trust you, opportunities arise naturally
-Seeing people you Love, happy, is worth more than any amount of money
-Being the Source of that Happiness……PRICELESS
-Bodies love to be active, together. Your health will look after itSelf if you’re happy and active
-Food is best enJOYed with others, also, if you’re laughing your ass off or dancing, EVEN BETTER
-You will find Love for yourSelf when you truly Love another, and vice versa
-You won’t get that part until you get it
-Family is important, one day they will not be here, Love them, and avoid the toxic ones, with Love
-Forgive your parents. Seriously, OMG everyone is doing their own personal best, even when they fail us. Parents, you get this. Non-parents….trust me on this one.
-Have Compassion for those who fail you, that was never their intention. Have Compassion for you.
-Have Compassion. Period. This is another, you’ll get it when you get it
-Let yourSelf off the hook. No matter what you did. It doesn’t need to hang on top of you yet another moment. Do the work. Let it go. Again. Compassion. We all fuck up. Get. Over. It. Now. Move. Forward. Compassion.
-Find your tribe, and when you do, roll around! EnJOY life. Say YES! Go with the flow. See their greatness. Breathe through their annoyances. Talk about it all. Love eachother. Fully.
-Be Love. Again. When you get it, you GET IT.
It is only in Come-unity, with others, that we can serve. Being in Service to what matters to us is a human desire.
This Come-unity I have the Honor of being part of today. It’s incredible. Every human in it. Amazing. I could have never imagined that my life would look like this. I would never in a million years trade people in to be the one who “does it all on my own”. I don’t see a badge of honor there. Not anymore.
Not only do I have a Village, my Village has ME. I serve this community, that full-fills us and we all move out into the world. Each of us making a difference for another, then another. It’s a ripple effect I am proud to be a part of.
Who could have known then, just a few years later I would have a giant community. I am in Love with you all, each for your own greatness.
I have been at a loss for words lately, actually! Mostly with mySelf, with all y’all I always have stories to share! I just look around, at all of you, and think, OMG, THANK YOU. The thought crosses my mind to list you all, but that isn’t necessary.
If you are part of my life, in any capacity, Thank you, You are Love(d).
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If you are part of my inner circle, FUCKING THANK YOU. Wow. It’s been a ride. Thank you for being by my side. Without you, I would not be here. I mean it. You are Love(d).
For my besties….my heart……my Love Army……..and if you know this is you…………………….BIIIITTTTCHHHESS!!! It takes a Village, and without you, well……who the fuck wants to finish that. I Love you. You are the Bees Knees. The Cats Meow. I mean, come on, life is a ride and we are on this bitch. No words. Thank you, I am deeply Honored to call you my Friend. You know who you are, your heart is warming when you read this…..its YOU. You are Love(d) out Loud. Judy Style. For Realz. Huge Hugs. Deep Bows. Exploding, Expanding Heart. Thank you, for all of it, for what’s to come, for who you are.
FUCKING THANK YOU.